I am officially 1 year past my last street shift on an ambulance. Honestly I have been dreading this day, its one thing to be in that ethereal mindset of “well I’m not at the one year mark yet” and I am taking it really hard. There are people who are close to me who Read More…
Category: The Scary Shit
Protected: PTSD Symptoms and the Impact On Your Life.
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Scars
I am going to talk about scars for a moment, both physical but also emotional scars. I can talk about all of the emotional scars working in EMS has given me, from the long nights dealing with an almost endless stream of drunk or indigent people who have lost all hope, to the children who Read More…
Like a Fucking Warrior of Old
I am gearing up for another big surgery, the time frame for this is still pretty soft, in that there are a few hoops to jump through in order to get to that point. This has started causing me some anxiety, I am sure this is my brains way of dealing with the fact that Read More…
Coming to Grips With the Sunset of My Career
I am rapidly realizing that it’s ok that my time in the Emergency Services is coming to a close. I have had some great times on this job, my certifications expire in 2018, I will most likely go through one more certification cycle as it makes logical sense especially if I am going to an Read More…
Reflections
Earlier today I learned of the tragic passing of one of the people I work with at the Renaissance Festival. He passed away tragically in a hit and run accident Sunday afternoon, his wife who taught my son all about stilt walking and performing with a crowd was in the vehicle with him, she is Read More…
Always Eat Your Fries First
in 1994 when i was just a young EMT-Basic one of my instructors gave me some sage wisdom in regards to meal consumption while working in an ambulance. This advice was to always eat my french fries first, french fries do not microwave well and are really only good when you get them initially, so Read More…
The Great What if.
Lately I am finding it harder and harder to do things, its becoming harder to get out of bed, its becoming harder to walk, and I am having a harder time to doing any of the life tasks I was able to do a few weeks ago. I am also having a strange drumming in Read More…
A Long Bout of Depression
Things have been kinda rough for me of late, the stress of my upcoming surgery, learning to be a dispatcher, and functioning within my limitations might be catching up with me. Last Thursday was the three year anniversary of my first cancer diagnosis, and coincidently Friday was when my second bout of cancer was confirmed Read More…
Cancer and its Mental Trauma
September 8th of this year will mark 23 years of EMS experience for me, in that time I have treated everything from sprained toes and the flu all the way to babies murdered by mothers too drunk to understand why we wont let he see her baby. When I first started we were told in Read More…