We always talk about how EMS will rule your life after a few years, you find that your friends all become ems related while your non ems friends rapidly start to drift off. Your spouse if they aren’t prepared or part of the EMS culture already will start to become a stranger because you live and breath EMS.
I have learned over the years to do a sort of self check, I will pause and re-evaluate where my outside life is heading, and if I need to re balance my work and outside life.
Recently while Mrs. ZM and I were talking I started to notice that my work life balance had become unbalanced, I was ignoring my wife and dwelling on the negatives far to much in regards to my surgery and everything that had happened. Some would say that I had every right to feel devastated about what happened, but that excuse can’t last forever. So I started out by setting reminders for myself to make small changes in my daily life, doing one cleaning task, along with a reminder to not wear the same t-shirt multiple days in a row. Mrs. ZM and I have been trying to reconnect and things are moving forward.
The interesting things is that the last few weeks have seen a surge in my recovery, where I used to not be able to lay on either of my sides, I have discovered I can handle being on my left side and my right now, as well as I am having a slightly easier time moving around, I still have a dislocated hip and damaged pelvis so walking is still very difficult, but I am not hurting as much.
My example is a good one in that when we start looking at things through the lens of being somehow damaged whether physically or psychologically we can hamper our own healing, and it can damage our relationships at home. I was lucky Mrs. ZM and I have always enjoyed a certain level of frank discussion on issues, this was strengthened in the last year by simply saying to each other, I wont keep anything back from you no matter how much it may hurt, those discussions rarely hurt for long, in fact I have found that in the last few weeks I am no longer feeling so negative about life and other aspects.
So be honest with your partners not just the ones you share a vehicle with but the ones who help put you back together when the world gets to heavy. Thats I strongly feel is one of the easiest ways the re build your work life balance, also go somewhere other than an ems related event no and then, re connect with your non ems friends, you may find that the world is a big beautiful place.